The Nankipooh Enquirer
The Tommy-Town Times
"Covers the South like Sorghum Syrup"
P. O. Box 48
Nankipooh, Georgia
Tommy_Town, Georgia
Editor in Chief: Colonel Bascomb Biggers
Ace Reporter : Scoop Biggers
"The Nankipooh Primary"
Well, we had to postpone the primary election down here in Nankipooh due to the the Hog Flu. Ain't nobody got it yet, but everybody is scared of getting it, so nobody wants to come down to the Biggers Grocery and mark their ballot for mayor of Nankipooh. Now this has got the Skunks(Republicans) and the Polecats (Democrats) all in an uproar since they all hate sitting around the house when they should be out on the stump. Of course, without all the politicking going on, the air around Nankipooh has got a whole lot cleaner, and the temperature has dropped nearly three degrees without all that hot air circulating about.
A bit of side news has come up with the story about the incumbent Skunk Mayor, George Bradshaw, who is sporting a big bump on his head from where his better half whacked him with her rolling pin. It seems after a few days of cabin fever listening to George whine about not being out on the stump, the little lady just couldn't stand it no more, and that was the only way she could get him to shut up!
The news from the National Primaries for President of the Good Old USA is about the same, with the Skunks and the Polecats still arguing about who gets to count the money for the next four years. Nothing has changed much, except with everyone scared of the Hog Flu, you don't hear as much of the politicking, not that it matters, since its the same old horse manure as always. Of course that's why Old Bascomb is running for President.
I don't steal much and I don't skim much, at least as compared to the Skunks and the Polecats. Don't forget, they both stink. Also, don't forget that I ain;t never lied to you, except for maybe, right now. And, I also could use a steady job for the next four years.
"Now that's the way I see it, and you can tell'em I said so!"
Bascomb Biggers
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Bascomb Biggers for President
"Make Fried Catfish the National Dinner"
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