"Can I get some Credit?"

DATELINE February 20, 2014

"Can I get some Credit?"

By: Scoop Biggers

I was listening to one of Bascomb's stories the other day about the time when Old Billy Brown came into the Biggers Grocery down there in Nankipooph and asked for some credit to pay for his groceries.  Billy ran a small farm about three miles up the road near Fortson, and he and Bascomb had known each other for nearly forty years.  Billy had never been too good at farming, nor anything else for that matter.  He usually raised just enough cotton to stay only a year or two behind in his bills, which almost always got paid before they were three years old.

So Bascomb says, "Say Billy don't you already owe me for about six months worth of groceries?"  "Well that's true, says Billy, but I'm going to bring you half of that money next week." So Bascomb says, "Well lets see, if you pay me next week for three months worth of groceries, you will still owe me for three months plus this week, and I guess next week's too. So, when do you think you might be able to pay me for those three and a half months worth of groceries?" "Probably in a month or two", says Billy.

So Bascomb bagged up the groceries, and when Billy left, he wrote down the amount in his ledger under Billy's name.  After Billy had gone, Bascomb turned to Nate Dawson sitting over by the checker board, and said, "Old Billy hasn't been paid up on his bill since he had that bumper crop about twenty five years ago.  At this rate my grand children will be collecting money from his grand children.  That is, unless he has another bumper crop pretty soon.  Its a good thing that man ain't running the country, or we would all be in a heap of trouble!"

I guess Old Bascomb hasn't read the paper much lately, or he would know that the people running the country just raised the debt ceiling for the country up to more than seventeen trillion dollars. Now that's going to take some bumper crop, just to get us back to even!

"Just my opinion"

Scoop Biggers

"Fallin Skies"

DATELINE February 03, 2014:

"Fallin Skies"

By: Bascomb Biggers

I was readin about the big snow storm up in Atlanta the other day and I got quite a chuckle readin about how everybody was blamin the mayor and the governor for what a big mess they had.  Now, the mayor is a Polecat (Democrat) and the governor is a Skunk (Republican), and you know what Old Bascomb thinks about those two parties; "they both stink".  I got pretty tickled readin about all the finger pointin that was goin on, and it reminded me of a little mess we had down here in Nankipooh a while back.

A few years back, the Standing Boy Creek overflowed its banks durin a heavy downpour and washed away old Josh Green's chicken coop.  Now Josh was really upset cause he lost three of his prize layin hens, and he thought the mayor of Nankipooh ought to buy him some new chickens, since nobody in the government came by and told old Josh that the creek might flood during a heavy rain.  How was he to know, just because the creek floods every time it rains hard.  After all the mayor and the government are supposed make sure that bad things don’t happen to us.

In a related story, Chicken Little called the Enquirer to let us know that the sky was fallin, but we decided not to print the story, since it is the governor's responsibility to let folks know about things like that, in order to make sure that folks don’t get caught outside lookin up just as the sky starts to fall.

Of course, you know that Old Bascomb don't think much of big government, and I shore don't  like the Skunks and the Polecats much either.  But it seems to me that the government has got its hands full runnin things and doin what they are supposed to be doin, without havin to be in charge of the weather too.  Back when I was farmin, I didn't need for the governor to come by and tell me to cover up my strawberries every time we had a frost comin.  Farmers know that when it comes to the weather, you got to pay attention, and look out for yourself.  If more folks would look out for themselves instead of expectin the government to do everything for them, the country might be a little better off.

"Now that's the way I see it and you can tell'em I said so."

Bascomb Biggers

MAKE "REAL VALUE" THE NATIONAL OBJECTIVE !