The Nankipooh Enquirer
"Covers the South like Sorghum Syrup"
RE: "Retirement these Days"
I was sittingg down at the Nankipooh General Store the other day playing checkers with my cousin Pete on one of those plus ninety degree Nankipooh summer days, when in comes my cousin Jimmy looking just about whipped. Old Jimmy picked up a mason jar of sweet tea and downed it in just about one gulp. "What's up Jimmy?", I says. "My old mule Jenny just dropped dead in the traces while I was plowing out back of the house", he says. I guess it was time for her to "retire" he says.
Now that started me thinking about retirement, which ain't that far off for old Bascomb. Of course that little dab of money I got saved up for retirement ain't much, and these days its worth less than it was, what with the Skunks and the Polecats spending money they ain't got, and printing more to cover for it. The bank pays me less for my savings account than the rate of inflation, and yet the DC politicians keep giving the banks more money, and they keep getting richer and richer. If they ain't got enough, the big Federal bank will loan them more at no interest. Lets see you borrow money and pay no interest!
They say there is more than one way to skin a cat, and I reckon that the Shunks and the Polecats got all the ways figured out, when it comes to the big guys getting richer and the little guys getting poorer. All they got to do is keep some of the folk's heads above water, so they can keep squeezing enough money out of them to keep themselves and the fat cats rolling. Of course sooner or later, you can't squeeze no more out of that turnip, but they can't see that far down the road. They just want to keep running up the debt till everything comes falling down.
Now I ain't trying to make you feel low, it just seems that old Bascomb and a lot of others ain't going to find retirement till we fall dead behind the plow, just like old Jenny. The only thing I know to do is keep throwing the Skunks and Polecats out of office, till we get a batch that will stop spending money they ain't got! That's why Old Bascomb is running for President of the Good Old USA!
"Now, that's the way I see it, and you can tell'em I said so!"
Bascomb Biggers
