DATELINE August 15, 2013:
"Vacation""
By: Scoop Biggers
Hey Honey, pack the bags, we are headed off for our vacation. I am mighty tired after fixing all the problems around here in Nankipooh, so me and the little lady are going to take a little time off, and head up to Mulberry Grove, to Camp Biggers, for some well deserved R&R! If its good enough for the President, then its good enough for me. He is up at Camp David getting a rest from all of his problem solving, and good for him.
Lets see now, what's the tally sheet on all of the problems he has fixed since his last vacation. Well there is the healthcare program, that's been put on hold. Of course there is a little un-rest in Egypt, but not many are being killed so far. Then there is that bad guy in Syria who unleashed chemical weapons on the population and killed about a hundred thousand, but we gave the rebels some rifles, so they will be all right
Most of the fires over government scandals have been covered up to the point where they are only smoldering, so that will be OK. There are those pesky folks in Korea, but they haven't fired off a missile in several weeks now, and those Arab Terrorists scared us a little last week with some threats, but they are on the run, so no worries there. The economy is rocking along with only ten or fifteen million unemployed, and we did knock about 10% off of the amount of increase to our sixteen trillion in debt.
Of course that sore-head in Russia is still mad at us, but who needs them anyway? Besides, cancelling that meeting gives your old Prerz a little more time for vacation anyway, and its good to relax in the hammock with a cold lemonade, and count up all that is right in the world!
"Just my opinion"
Scoop Biggers
MAKE FRIED CATFISH THE NATIONAL DINNER!
